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lyrics

On a moonlit night
in a trace-like state
with a gut punched love
and a guilty gait
behind a douglas fir he waits
while my body hesitates

fear is just what i need
to break these chains
to fill this need
and i don't think that this will mean that much
but a wrecked heart still needs to touch

He touches my face
his hands feel so strong
and it feels foreign
but it doesn't feel wrong
my bones have yearned for this
as i lean into his kiss

the song in the dream said
that "you share my name when you share my bed"
but i don't think my name is worth much
and a wrecked heart still needs to touch

but i miss you so much

you couldn't have been here with me
to feel this change
and i couldn't have come home to you
smelling of his aftershave
i've struggled with these feelings for most of my life
and this is just one night
I'm seeing through new eyes
it's like they're not mine
and these moons are so bright

fear is just what i need
to shed this shame
to feel relief
and i don't think that this will change that much
but a wrecked heart still needs to touch

credits

from Winters: Here, Gone, Imagined, released October 12, 2023
all instruments, voices, and arrangements by mt@trustdarkness.com and/or various subpersonalities.

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Trust Darkness Seattle, Washington

aka Sleep Deprivation aka __mt__ aka mteb, mikeyT, other names... a drummer with a guitar, trying to figure out what to do with himself in his early 40s.

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